My Blog

The inverse Skinners BoxSidestepping

Posted by Nicole Mon, November 26, 2018 15:03:59

'Skinners Box' is a term coined from Psychology thats frequently mentioned in the gaming community. It deals with the stimuli that get us to be more or less likely to do something. Like ... cookies for a Dog. So for instance when playing Free to Play titles all the blingin and chingin stimulates our minds that we've done something great although we just pushed a few buttons on the screen as instructed - and it gets us to repeat things. To feel rewarded. And sure - we can compare that to a drug. The momentary high from something thats potentially damaging. When I mention the 'inverse' of it - its what the applied Skinners Box does to those that apply it. So, the experiment may have started out of harmless curiosity - but someone saw it and right away "ka-ching! (Thats a way to make money!)". So they create that Skinners Box-esque Video Game environment, sell it, people buy into it and that rewards them for it and so they'll try to do more of it.

And so we can see that gamers being willing to buy into empty promises - or promises that are most certainly bollocks because 'experience' - lets them devs think they can get away with it - 'ka-ching' - and so on and so forth.

How it relates to TolkienGeneral Stuff

Posted by Nicole Fri, November 23, 2018 13:49:26

Well, for sure he came from somewhere and went somewhere. Its a still picture in time - and I think its wrong to assume that what we are in this world is always a clear image of what we are inside. If you're a male artist of some sort, you won't always be a male artist ... per se. So the idea. Who we are and what we might be of course depends entirely on us, ... but so is each lifetime another chance to discover something new. Growth after all takes time. Consequences. So - if we narrow ourselves down to a small subset of things, there's the question for "what else?". So, what is a "painter" in a time where there is no paint? How or how was one a programmer way back when computers weren't a thing? Yea - 'somehow' - ... but not quite that! The latter part is for sure.

Also can you go and take me and put it into Tolkien ... but then you take the consequence as the origin. And I'm not sure if that Star Trek Knowledge applies there. In the "vast echo of the infinite" it might - but too is ever-evolving; So that always there is the 'here and now'. And the more concrete it is, the less it fluctuates in the vastness of the ahead of us.

So, to say that Tolkien was the same little slut that I am ... is probably right. However - I'm quite sure that a lot of the things that affect me are much older than I am. But - so the thing with Mary - I started up as a guy - and respectively do I still cherish male ... well, I did, ... affections for them; Which in turn make me more comfortable within the male position and thus tend to think to a greater degree in that way as where I would not. These are things I've recently come to 'unwind'. By now ... its hard to say, but, ... its difficult for me to really masturbate; I rather lube up my tip and rub that. Well, it started off as anticipation that that would sooner or later be the only thing left. And the 'stem' feeling would transit into a 'hole' feeling. Similar to the Anus with different degrees of 'fucked-ness'. And so also different setups of experience. There's a feeling that takes me in as defenseless and exposed to getting fucked in ways that exploit my vaginas exposure. Well - there is a certain weight of discomfort to it, which is there to make it feel like rape - while deep inside the slut that resonates within cannot denie it. In this sense a lot of rapey things, setup wise, can be done to me. But in that it is already a thing of the Slut. While in the idea 'all' is possible, the 'eternal goodness' demands itself for everyone attached to the True Vine - so that the Slut is finally the thing that matters. She in turn lives between her own Slutty fulfillments and the physical experience of the shackles of slavery. So, what prevents her from being the thing that takes over are the demands that produce other consequences. So, where the Ninefold Light takes over and provides us with strength we need in order to sustain a certain form fundamentally. So, a spine that prevents us from bouncing out of control; So, out of control within a controlled environment.

Which isn't all there is as the mind expands into a new Dimension. Regarding the inflexes and outflexes of our consciousness, there was the thing with the Belugia Natanais - where, right now I think of the 'furthest "way down"' its path of evolution is the 'now'. And we can envision future stages of Growth to awareness of a next higher degree of Dimensionality. A new 'way' of being - a new 'high up Gnosis' that includes the previous one as a given set of options. So, like 2D implies that there is a 'value' (the 1st Dimension) - it creates the vertex by simply ... what. Well - it now '"scales with"' the tool given. A value. A dimension of values. Each 'point' on that axis implies that there is a second value. A vector, mathematically speaking. So, now having the tools of planes, growing into a higher dimension adds value to plane into cube. So, on each [value] of D3, there's a D2, while each D2 is a D1. So, 3 values, where each implies its predecessor. So, what came prior to D1? D0? Or ... comes? Maybe just 1. Because no number is more wholistic - and more real. It is not a value per-se, for the scope of manipulation is not yet there. It just 'is' - and so has superiority to 0. And as we can see, 'zero' -must be- a false concept of ~the void~. //-a propos-


So - where were we?

The Question for whether I want to be this or that "can be asked, but doesn't have to be asked". Like, "lets say, there is a little slut - but she's actually quite creative. ...". "What if" ... she would be born male, in a time and culture wherein Sex and Gender ... had ... "unquestioned positions". So, the 'individual' - whatever that implies at the point of birth - grows up within a culture that is so and so while ~her~ body is "this and that". What becomes of an individual comes down to what it 'does' - but as there are many different types of Video-games where 'the thing to do' is different all throughout, we all live in our individual situations. So, our freedom is restricted. Yet what becomes of us comes down to what we do. What we do "spends time" - and our time that we live is our ... lifetime. Well, this goes to say that creative ambition breeds art - and the thing with Art is that it so happens to be exploited these days. A good idea means Capital - and throughout the times we always required resources in order to build stuff. Well, it was easy, "probably", going out, cutting wood together and build a fence. All the capital required would be - Energy. Sustenance. But how much would be left of that fence today? Well - so, higher civilizations came around when 'capitals' formed wherein the wealth of the regions ended up being carried together. So, the guy who makes bricks knows who and how - and given a facility he can then hire people to mass produce them. This exists in equilibrium with the available work force. Where social structures also emerge in that equilibrium, creating a System to get things going.
So, ... all this coming together happened differently here and there. And when there now is a System that has like 2 positions at the top of the 'brick creation hierarchy' - what is there in 'wanting' to be there? Well, at some point they will need successors, ... and ... those that would naturally follow -could- be those that worked there the longest or perform well enough. So, what we spend our time on - crafts our lifetime.

But what when you so arrive and the thing is full?

Punch a hole? Get someone kicked out?

Well, "the way" ... so might be another one. Its like a curve down a water-slide.

And now ... this life?
My life.


I've at some point begun to venture on my paths with backup. That would be this moment in the Philippines where I picked up that book that delivered me to a decision that I would make through which the Lord would impart His blessings on me. Whatever I 'could have done' ... so and so ... to me, would just have been time I might have better spent looking for the truth there where it isn't constantly denied. Well, all in all there was always that 'Challenge' - well. I lived my faith "a priora" - while my family pushed me to find a job, asking me to put it aside as a hobby. But the conflict therein so happened to be that it was the time I had taken 'for' it ("to be real"...) - that took me to those points where I had something significant to share that nobody wanted to really listen to. And so the question of where 'these things came from' - takes me to a funny moment in my old room back then. I had hung green cloth to the ceiling and at a moment where my room was in chaos, these cloth sheets looked like but-cheeks and the chaos in my room as though it was farted in through that. And in essence, it is quite right a divine statement that took further nuance later down the road during my times working in the red-light. I could have things my way. God would clap me on the back by blessing this attitude; And everyone would succumb to it. When things got down to those priorities - my priorities - I can have it my way and God will protect me.

Well, of course within our own code of reason and dignity. So, whatever I did, I also spent time with God. And I'm sure that it wasn't unnoticed! (LoL!). So have we been down our course - and the thing with me is that ... whatever illusory self-image I might have of myself, I basically enjoyed my time as a prostitute as I discovered those certain aspects of myself that have accompanied me throughout my life and there then came together around a -centrified- "reason of logic".

And in times like these where the gender question hasn't only been asked already - we have grown upon it. TO ask it over and over again is to ask for a greater understanding of gender itself, and those of us that believe that we are ~eternal souls~ believe that there is more to it than just biology. We would so grow to another Level by asking for how to deal with it.

But so - what is an 'illusory self-image'?

What is a 'self-image'?

What is ... 'being'?

What is 'essence'?

Is it safe to say that no matter how others perceive one - that one will always only perceive it its own way?
Well. Through QUantum Physics we have learned to think a bit more about certainties - like saying that to every rule there is an exception. That 'smudge' of unlikeliness. So what good is faith in God if that faith doesn't really gap that divide?

So to say that everyone has to see Him for themselves - ...//23.11.2018//...

Well. Is there a point to this other than going onto those huge tangents?

Well. However. There's now the point that I'm not as sure about Tolkien as to confidently influence his reputation; Yet for me - it works. I started up pretty much like I would ... I assume. Whenever I had a tool to do so - I used it for crafting works of fantasy. Early on I took huge inspirations from already established things like the Turtles and Batman - and I had weird, diffuse images that I now would say are from the Silmarillion. Well, the divine origin part. I'm not sure why they were there - but I remember that I was confused by it, also by there being a complexity I couldn't fathom - and so my "own" fantasies in that regard were decisively simple. Cereyllas origin there so is the "Big Bang", symbolized by the Templers "Rose" - which visualizes how the 4 Elements bash together and "spawned Creation" - from where on its the 4 Elements plus "Good and Evil" (Light and Dark, ... whatever). What I didn't have were connections - while being socially strongly dragged into the outskirts of society. I could have gained connections when properly going through school - but the path I was on in the Philippines was a College degree in Nursing and that bad taste of the idea that I might not be able to shake that off of me. That my hopes for going to a Movie School might get thwarted. Well, I drifted away from those things anyhow - and I think the fact that I basically had no real friends is part of the reason why I finally was alright with prostituting myself. There was just me and my ... curiosities ... and the desire for some ... change, ... downtime, ... whatever.
There my inner slut prevailed.
It was, as the idea was there, not even an issue.
Strange attraction ...

And on my way there I felt that my inner femme was ... it was as though she'd be becoming real. And thats how I regard it too - that this time helped me to understand myself in those ways as that I had a lot of time to think about them. ANd so is it practically that what this life of mine focusses on. As I have the chance to think about my Gender - there are going to be answers. And eventually they created that craving that wouldn't allow me to be male.

Whether its going to be how I envision it in my wildest dreams or not isn't the main issue there.

Why I collect PornSidestepping

Posted by Nicole Thu, November 22, 2018 01:08:33

A question I've been asking myself recently. So - last weekend I had my last bit of dope - got settled to live sober until Rehab starts (next week, off from 27th to 25th) ... and yet the desired "creative flux" didn't come. Well, I've written some code high, starting again, and wrote it so that once sober I could finish all the more tedious stuff. Doesn't come. Instead I've spent the recent days sorting through all my Porn. I have 3.5 gigabytes of images (I do have more - but they are 'too secluded' "for now" ... "impact delay" [store for later]).

Impact Delay means that I do what I 'can' - and looking through/making sense of certain things that just don't fit I better leave aside. Its like in LoL or Smite - or any MOBA - where, you can't have it all at once. You have to start with one simple item - or more - however basic things to get you started.

And still I have gathered 9524 images so far. To that, I created one 'Extraction' folder where I dumped everything into. Well, but 'this time' not Ctrl.A-ing (Select Everything) them inside, but roughly skimming through them, screen by screen, to sort out at least those few "Annoying" ones that I wouldn't want to deal with. Then I wanted to sort through the Extraction folder, but when starting to move stuff around, things usually went downhill. So I copied all I had into a ROOT and a STEM folder. Well, copied into STEM and then moved them into ROOT. So, a plus for Windows: WHen I have new stuff and I copy them in - duplicate filenames are removed from the selection cue in Windows Explorer (10) - while in Linux one has to be a bit more creative. (Move all inside, deselect, ctrl.Z and only those moved back are selected. Then copy ... and on). So I have an Up-to-date Root Folder to check for whats in STEM. And along the way I also payed sacrifices to the 'things that get lost' demand - to not overburden myself.

So, other folders I ended up having next to ROOT and STEM are 'removed', 'ex', and a bunch of others ... like 'x'. Removed is for images I wanted to remove from the stream but still collect. So the others. I should probably name them by 'what' they remove. But 'ex' then also ended up collecting images I had not removed; But wouldn't really belong. Like things that are just funny or ... just don't belong.
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In STEM I did similarly. There's an 'Ugly', a 'Rest' an 'Excitation, a 'Decitation' and various thematic folders. So - Ugly is for those that I have and somehow want to keep but they don't really do anything for me. They 'feel' somehow ugly. The 'rest' is what ~would~ stay, but to not get confused has to get moved out of the way. Some of the thematic ones I use as explicit drop in folders; And others are more and others less a "Stay/Ugly" version of a give topic as well. So, I ended up moving a lot of Bondage images into Excitation rather than Bondage; While the 'Warrior' folder is a bit of an "early excuse" to get rid of all non-sexual stuff. Well, to however sort that which isn't really an 'Excitation', although that shouldn't really be a task since 'actually' they would contain their own excitations.

In the Excitation folder then I have 'dist'(orted), 'down', 'gif', 'STAY', 'SUPER' and 'x'. So, I go through the images on screen, move everything into all but SUPER until all the images remaining go there. So, this is just sorting out - and also a way of saying that one doesn't have to be 'too' cautious. If you're alright with "loosing" something to "down" or don't need in "STAY" or higher - whatever. 'x' is thereto something aside of it all. I end up having images that for sure went into Excitation but then, they don't really belong anywhere.

SUPER is then effectively the Level 3 of 'up-filtered' imagery, ... and right now I have 5623 in my STEM, 1686 in my Excitation and 627 in my SUPER folder. And my Pregnant folder is just 100 short to the 'Rest' folder. (I created a folder to be named like the folder I would skim through next (... "base of origin". Of course I had to take breaks!).

Now I assume that starting with all my Image Material - including my Non-Sexual collection maybe - everyone would have different stuff in their SUPER folder. And so there would be images - I suppose - that reflect me in my most intimate that others would pick as well. But it might not get to their Lv. 3 because they aren't really like that. So it might end up in Lv.2/STAY - or elsewhere. That idea however so spawned the idea of this visual representation of where we regard ourselves. (And my Ugly folder isn't all that Ugly! Here and there I think I have uglier ones in higher up folders; Where, taste is in the eye of the beholder I guess).

Well. In SUPER I then went on to make a copy, like with ROOT and STEM, and in 'upward_stash' (the other is 'upward copy') made 'Faces', 'Styles', 'Lv3', 'Lv4' and two "Level 3 Identifiers". 2 things that 'stand out' (or should) - but then had to be a little desperate about putting stuff in there. And here maybe the individual 'better be inspired'. Well. Lv3 is however the "new" Ugly folder. Everything that doesn't go in there, either goes up or not. If not - it is preferred in either of the two, or it is just 'style'. If it is more than just 'style' its a Face. THis is, as I think, here because 'SUPER' is already "pretty defined". Some uglies got to go out - and the rest then needs some 'definition' to create the Lv4 abstract. What goes up goes up - and now something silly. I feel again like making a copy. I might just move it, but being tempted to move stuff directly into Lv4 - ... I'm unsure ... .

Well. I want to do stuff with it now - but certainly still have things coming. Plus, I got all the other stuff that I might want to work with. So, my Pregnant folder has 300+something images - and instead of sorting them into categories and Levels I might just want to pick one for some other purpose. In other words do I have some image repository with 5000-something images yet unaccounted for. So I can have a Lv4 copy somewhere - I ... have a separate partition and thats handy in that usually copying is the default action here. Moving stuff within a partition just changes the files path - technically/theoretically - but moving stuff to another partition is to store it in a different physical volume - so, just changing the path won't work. So it would be copied there - and then deleted. "Move" is just an abstraction in that regard. So, when I now have new stuff going into Lv4, and I took files out of the copy, just copying the one to the other creates duplicates. Saying that I might move Lv4 to base and move files within upward_stash into a kept-empty Lv4 folder - though, before moving it from here to there I also copy it into the "mirror"guard"" folder.

So, Lv4 is renamed into Lv4_mirrored - and a new Lv4 folder is created. For all the other images - that go into "'Manifest'" - well. Something weird. I now have a 'transit' folder with 'Import' and 'Mirror' in it. So - I would copy stuff into 'Import' - and at some end of gathering then copy Import into Mirror - with those new ones then going into 'transit' itself. From there I would work with it - so, I clear 'transit' and move Import and Mirror up. And the Lv4 copy is now called ROOT.

What I now ended up doing, was that I wanted to just fill the import folder with something and took from the Level3-subtree a folder and basically ended up selecting my favorites therein. So, Manifest- ROOT and "Export" Are containing a "special selection" of items though Export contains those that haven't made it to ROOT. Another mechanism of relief. It would get complicated when downgrading things - so, as a rule of thumb, beyond SUPER there is no more downgrading.
But what now with Import/Export. Those images come in from all sorts of different locations - and mirroring the entire data-tree?
... file-tree.

So - for my own Filesystem 'method' - I think I called it 'Meta-FS' but for better distinction ... to be less "demanding" ... dont know. I had something on my tongue. "TXF" ... well, like the filename. Anyhow. Meta-FS is designed with partitioning in mind. So - folders can be associated to Frames - and Frames contain Filesystems. Here Meta-FS is complex in that technically it is just ... like a bootloader. A part of Meta-FS would be the ZERO partition which is the 'bootsequence' ... place. But anyhow. With the things thought of here I take it in that ... files can be mirrored 'if' they have a "safe spot". So, it is a way of removing "junk" from the filesystems by sorting certain things away.

So, now I took another folder into it and then mirrored it in. And now there's a context problem. So, I have 'Daisification' and 'RapeChamber' in my upward_stash. In both there's a picture of a Domina. And now they both pop out in the same folder; Which was technically something that "we tried" to prevent. But so is the nature of these things as well. What to do with images? You look at them once ... and then ... they get sorted away. And yea, eventually we can look at them again to be ashamed of/laugh about our past.

Now I went into my Lv3 folder to pick a few from there. And sure there are favorites again. So is there one image that works as a centrified statement, but so happens to be in Lv3. But right now I don't have a better one at hand to express it that way. Those that get close do so in a distorted way.
And then it also happens that on selecting certain images - or thinking about it - well, I'd compare it to Minesweeper. A whole lot of others want to come along. On one hand the images don't run away, on the other I worry that I could select duplicates. Well, silly me - I shouldn't worry that! The Mirroring takes care of that! And when done now - I end up having those yet unhandled in the Export folder. So, I should first clear that out before throwing in too much.

Now I created a Manifest/-- folder and moved a 'expr.Daisy' folder into it. That now is to resonate with what I meant earlier. It could at some point be called 'Feminization'. But it wasn't done yet. In this 'expression' folder I can now put images from a greater selection together - and technically take stuff from ROOT as well. Thats why I think inspiration matters as well. Or is it subconscious reveal?

So, that "by chance" there are those relevant images within those |lower tier| folders. ... [???@_$(*&#^riddled myself)]

Perhaps I should smoke some more pot. Yea, I got some today - well - received ... .

Anyhow - but what now of Lv4? I don't feel like taking things out!

So - I now moved all but 3 images into the expression folder. Oh, 4. Initially I thought 2. The other 2, ... I don't miss. One however although it quite puts a nail onto it - but probably too much, like ... when the Daisy is implied it just works better to a however more greater thing: The Doll.

Anyhow - by accidentally hitting ctrl.z and control.y while the browser was selected I deleted some image it seems and a folder wherein I stored xcf and its host folder. Luckily the xcf files somehow remained. Better than just the pngs I assume. Something like that shouldn't happen. And for such important stuff I would suppose something other than the default "click me away" pop-up.





A balance issueFundamental/Empirical

Posted by Nicole Wed, November 21, 2018 19:39:20

Just something to Write about ...

Well. The way I'm feeling ... uh. The 'wayS' - because this is about ~issues~ ... like straight: The one moment everything seems cool, in an upswing ... and it seems like there's nothing left to be bothered about. Then something happens. Like in this example: I do something - and then what I do comes loaded with issues that tell me what the thing I just did may have resolved, ... ~terrible stuff~ ..., where it wouldn't have helped had I known about it. So, this creates this weird situation where I simple put ... happen to be blind. Its a riddle in and of itself, what this means or could mean. To me it seems like I "see everything" - and when what I do seems to sit right, that idea is reinforced. I know that I there don't 'see everything' per se - but I know why I did it and how I have set my mind up; Where in most of all cases - if not all (I suppose its all) - God has a significant hand to it. But so the question: How am I blind? And well - for once its stuck in there, that I don't really do stuff 'knowing' what it solves but just ... that it has to be or does something as it adds up in the bigger picture.

And then this stuff comes rather randomly. I so was thinking about stuff and suddenly I thought of the thing between me and Marie as a ... well. As flawed by misconception. The idea is that on some plane she's moving into a direction, where I found myself coming from the opposite direction while the image framed it so that she would expect me to be by her side moving into the same direction. So, her movement was towards my side and mine towards her. In simplest terms, I guess, the thing is that all of us have our individual 'normality' and a given imbalance therein that lets us 'desire' something that isn't a part of it. I think: The more sexual beings of us - and I don't mean by 'physics' but certainly 'of/in the mind' have a more sexual 'normality' and mostly because their mind "breeds it like that". To us the "world of norms" is prioritizing sexual ideas - which we (learn that we) have to be ashamed about and so we hide it. Its our "dirty little secret", basically.
And so - that is the idea - we 'desire' some bit of normality - some drift away from this sexual"ism". Likewisely that don't happen to be as sexual, or passionate or such, would happen to desire some of that. In a different way than they desire those things thats of their mindedness.
How this translates into the thing between Marie and me is I think a matter of how our emotions align. So, what has above been declared a 'direction', would in the ~taken sense~ also translate into 'intimacy wishes'. So, when two of a kind come together, mingle and merge, moving on as they discover one another - they're on "the same wavelength". Hmmm ...
And this helps them grow 'deeper' towards each other - though or as it also is a 'moving along' with each other. But would our 'targets' really be the opposite end? Well - thats a new question that maybe has to grow a little.

For what this issue has been so far - the thing is that while I looked at it I noticed a distortion. So, there is that issue that "by common tongue" 'all desire Sex' and so the idea that what my kind would have were like paradise. And so I insert the term 'Work-Splice' to name something I get to write about later. But in essence its - in here - synonymous for the philosophy of work whereby what we earn is what we deserve by physical measures. So, the idea that the rich are rich because they deserved it, and everyone who isn't just hasn't earned it.

This now 'interferes' with this "directional splice" in form of a Pyramid. While there is a gradient, which: To reemphasize it: Is of our conscious normality (our "spiritual places" where at some point also clarity comes to factor in), this Pyramid has it that a point that accumulates closer to my "zero point" (of the normality) than the center - however carrying that as its top. So, the more we earned, the better the places we can "habitate" within - and when so rich that you don't have to work anymore ... well ... habitation is either just "nothing" or ... "Orgy" stuff. Right? We can all relate to that ... . Without any means to it - there is no way such a thing could even be organized. Means are not only money - but its the foundation on which it all rolls. I can know how all the way I want - and want all the way I ~would~, no money no ... something.

So, here we can already see an issue with the work-splice. You can assume that people that don't have also ~wouldn't~ - and so the question turns into a "what 'should' we, then?".

Anyhow, I then tried to "move the goalpost". What I conceived as a dislocated center (the pyramids top, a point on the line) - I simply moved to the center - on the line; And stuff happened. Like, people would start to realize that "always Sex" isn't really as happy as they might think. On that line we all feel our place somewhere - which is our place because we're fine with it. But this pyramid ... makes our perception of it all problematic. Because, if you're fine with being just a worker ... "a Drone" ... what is it that you 'deserve'?
Further, while we all so "main" our place - there's more to us than just one thing. Like so - some would expand more into sexuality than others. And things. Things we usually can't do because our social economy is shit! So we have to be alright with what is offered. And that generally narrows down in "what "they" say a drone has to be sufficient with" - which happens to be that narrow margin they can control, wherein we better stay so they can count those out that "don't behave properly (a.k.a. Risk Factors)".

Dun-dun-duuuuuuuuuunnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn ...

The Case of proper Education (1)General Stuff

Posted by Nicole Thu, November 08, 2018 21:05:19

I love it when scientific stuff can be explained Logically. AND so I want to establish the concept of the "first Rule of Logic" as being this: The easier the verbal configuration is to understand - the better". So that the simplicity becomes measure to quality. The point is this: Whence we grow, there is this that what once has been technical and complicated may one day appear in all simplicity. Like, ... the meaning of what it means to be grown up and independent - alias: Self-responsible. Well, at least here we do - as I assume that if these things become simpler - thats better too. So I love to come back to the "parable of the Good old Times" - where I like to introduce a Hunter and how the Craft got traditioned from one Generation to another. The tradition in this is nothing mythical, but simple a convergence between life and relevance. Hunting was required to bring food to the table. Or farming. Food is always a valuable ressource - so there will always be someone taking care of it.
Germany now has a shortage of Teachers - and if I were to blame our Educational System - I'd have to criticize it for having become too distant to the pupil. The pupil is treated like a Lab-Rat, or ... "Lemming", maybe "Zergling" ... the end to which is the also as "Poison Paper" referred to "Testimony" (so the literal translation of what we have as paper that contains our annual (or bi-annual) performance grades. With them the "Lemming" is then to go out and look for what niche he finds to fall into. And maybe the challenge of creating a good Educational System is after all similar to the challenge of winning a game in Lemmings - the game.

But more-over do I think that another problem with teachers is that there so need to people that have the desire to pass on knowledge to the next Generation. And in times where the split of the Generations is really dramatic - there's a gap of understanding and respectively evolving sympathies and grievances. The "Hip and New" attracts the "newer Models" and gives them a space to then even escape the elder generation. And this can also go on through Generations - where the "Escapist" is then no longer "Escaped" since there's a cultural bridge where else there would be just confusion. But still I realize that I don't really have a desire to play LoL (League of Legends). I think that LoL is a brand of society that is a younger generation to the "initial" Gamer crowd. The initial Gamer crowd simply emerged as a branch of Fantasy artwork. I think this is the widest definition. Nowadays there also is the opposition that some would call "Casual" Gamers - where some would like to include "CoD" (Call of Duty) and FIFA to that as well. And I think the dissonance comes from the Gap that exists between the Demands of the games that either crowd grew up with. The more Demanding kind of games - the absence of which is really lamented by many - were the first with ... Programming. Then came Arcades ... as the High End of what the Hardware was capable of. As Technology advanced - Programming Techniques and Ressources grew too - and so the complexity of what could be created. So was there the branch of the "old-school" established Arcade - and the ever evolving field of Entertainent Software. So ... PC Master Race? Well, in that case has gaming been Born on the PC, alright, but gaming itself then was its own branch - so that in terms of "Gaming" per-se, it depends on the kinds of Games you like.
And in the pathology to this text you can find something that you can compare to Archaeology. Well - History. And the so far undisputed Chamption: Causality. Everything comes down to a Reason - and in the Realm of Gnosis the ultimate reason to everything is Life. Life that could not be anything but Eternal and Infinite. Respectively does the term 'In-Finity' in this context reveal a sense of 'non finiteness' - so in the sense of "Never Done". That so because of Causality. Each consequence could so in theory converge with any other - yet so there will always be configurations that are yet to come.

So, did the first Insight now have a Start? A moment prior to which "nothing" Existed? And what is it born into? Thats the final question.

So ultimately we can realize that Existence is a mystery of its own - and so we can rationalize that there is a way in which sarcasm could be bad. I mean - Existence ... to be grateful for it ... or not? "It is - and now explain that!".
Hmm ... so how did we get here? "Digging for the Fundamentals".

The Legend of Good SexGeneral Stuff

Posted by Nicole Thu, November 08, 2018 21:04:04

wrong, replace Legend with Theory ...

The idea is this: The Sex I envision as part of my Clarity is ... well ... considerably good. And this goodness also comes in a given quantity. Which one is better doesn't really matter for too little of either is bad. (Simple Multiplication).

... Done! ...

When Love hurtsGeneral Stuff

Posted by Nicole Thu, November 08, 2018 21:02:15

its possibly by thinking of the cherished or cherishable moments - that echo like joy while the lamentation of its absence transforms it into something different.

To not underestimate the AntichristGeneral Stuff

Posted by Nicole Tue, November 06, 2018 16:09:38

Finally I realize that this ultimately turns a really good advise when thinking of it so: That God has given him "quite a punch" (or rather: Bunch of stuff that "might be" above our heads).